Showing posts with label Friendships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Friendships. Show all posts

Friday, October 24, 2014

My Life: ALL SHOOK UP! ~ By @ShelleyHendrix

We chose this theme, "All Shook Up" in 2013 to be our 2014 conference focus. At the time, I believed I had my material chosen as to what I would share and how I would offer encouragement to women about the times their lives became "all shook up."

My husband and I had given up the "American Dream" of home ownership in pursuit of God's will: greater margin, better financial stewardship, and a future worth looking forward to; but it was so hard to do! Approaching my 40th Birthday while selling or giving away almost everything I owned and moving into an apartment felt like such a HUGE (and embarrassing) step backwards.

During that same season, I heard the hard news that my book sales just weren't what any of us had anticipated they would be. Although my latest book has been featured in well-read magazines, received very positive feedback from readers and reviewers alike, the truth is that it just didn't sell well enough to move forward with my publishing house on another book title.

So, not only was my personal world all shook up, so, too, was my career.

By the way, I can't count how many times I've been advised by "marketing" and "PR" gurus to only appear "together," "strong," "successful," etc. I've been told, "Women want to see someone they can try to be like, so you have to at least appear to be 'that' kind of woman or they won't want to follow you."

Sorry to disappoint anyone, but that just isn't the case. (And those who "appear" to fit that bill, don't. No one does.)

With all of this as my reality, I felt like I was in a snow globe with pieces of my life scattered all over the place. I felt alone inside of that place and wanted so badly to be able to sit still and regain my balance- imagining that 2014 might include some opportunities for that. When it seemed like that was about to happen, the snow globe got "all shook up" all over again.

My husband resigned in April of this year from his position of 15 years (and the only job he has had since we met one another and married). While we know that this was absolutely God's timing and had the full support of those who know and love us best (including the staff of the organization he co-founded), we had NO idea what God had for us around the bend.
  • Would we remain in the field we have been in for so long?
  • Did God want us to move forward in full-time ministry?
  • Had God ended that season of our lives to take us into something completely different?
Without going into all the details (and taking up your whole day), I want to share just a few things that have helped Stephen and me remain steady while waiting for the scattered pieces to fall into place. (Truth be told, we're still in the season of waiting and watching.)
  1. We are rich with friendships and are grateful to have had some meaningful times of conversation and prayer with older, wiser, more mature men and women who have helped us both navigate the unknown steps of this current season. 
  2. We have been honest with God, ourselves, and safe friends about the struggles to trust God and take steps forward when walking by faith and not by sight. Allowing ourselves the freedom of sharing the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, has given others the freedom to know how to pray for us and how to encourage us in the midst of this challenging season.
  3. We have guarded ourselves from "unsafe" people by choosing to not overshare with those who don't have the skill set to be of any help anyway. Remember: just because someone is "saved," it doesn't mean that they are "safe." Scripture teaches us to be "cautious in friendship" (see Proverbs 12:26) for very good reason!
Notice that all three of these involve relationships. This should be no surprise: we were made from and for relationship after all. If you're in a season of being all shook up, my encouragement and challenge to you is to NOT muster up the strength or put on your big girl pants and deal with it; my encouragement and challenge to you is to identify the mature, safe, wise people in your life and bring them into your circle. Life is too short to make all the mistakes ourselves. Learn from others and experience the protection of their prayers while enjoying the safety and compassion of their friendship.

Seasons don't last forever. What you gain in an All Shook Up season will be treasured by you and by others who will benefit from your wisdom, compassion, grace and experience when their lives get All Shook Up!

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Join me and Church 4 Chicks along with best-selling author and life coach, Valorie Burton; Rise and Stein Morning Show Hosts, David and Leanna Stein; Stephen Hendrix (my better half by far!); and more at this year's AWAKEN 1-Day Conference. Tickets are available at www.church4chicks.ticketbud.com through OCTOBER 31 only!! Don't delay! Bring a friend!

Monday, October 6, 2014

6 Types of #Friends Every Woman Should Have ~ by @ValorieBurton #AWAKEN1Day

Valorie Burton will be our guest and one of our keynote speakers at the 7th Annual AWAKEN 1-Day Conference on November 8 and we would LOVE for you to be there!

Enjoy this helpful (re-)post from Valorie, pass it along to friends, and make sure to register before the deadline on October 31!  www.Church4Chicks.ticketbud.com

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Property of C4C 
6 Types of Friends Every Woman Should Have 
By
Valorie Burton
Do you rely on just one good friend? What would it take to nurture a few more close friendships? Why do you think some women are competitive with other women, but not the men? What can you do to put other women at ease and facilitate more authentic connections with women in your circle of influence?  
I want to share a special conversation starter with you from my latest book Happy Women Live Better: 13 Ways to Trigger Your Happiness Every Day. See the six specific types of friends every woman should have and spark up a conversation with your closest girlfriends this week to discuss what type of friend you may be.  
Points to Ponder

·         Studies show that it is a good idea to have several types of friends rather than relying on one or two to meet all of your needs.

·         Statistically speaking, your relationship with your girlfriends will likely outlast your marriage, your parents and your co-workers.  
  • One study showed that when fewer than 15% of the women in a firm were in positions of power, the women were competitive and backstabbing with each other. But when women represented more than 15% of the powerful positions, women were collaborative. 
Do you have the right mix of friends?
Not every friend can meet every need. Some will meet more than one need, but few can do it all! Here are six types of friends every woman needs:
The Wise Friend.
You can count on them to talk you out of doing something you'd regret, help you solve your latest dilemma, and give all-around sound advice about just about anything.
The Fun Friend.
Want to have a good time, be adventurous, or laugh 'til your stomach hurts? You can always count on this one.
The Travel Buddy.
Drama-free, this friend is adaptable, maybe even adventurous, and loves to see the world.
The Relationship Coach.
Transparent, real and willing to listen, this friend has figured a few things out in the love department and genuinely wants to see you happy when it comes to romance.
The Career Comrade.
You share a similar background and goals in your work life, and encourage each other to higher professional success.
The Accountability Partner.
To maximize your potential, this is your go-to pal to help keep you on track.
Now, let's turn the tables. Think of your four closest friends. Which type of friend are you to each of them?






This post is an excerpt from my latest book, Happy Women Live Better: 13 Ways to Trigger Your Happiness Every Day. Discover your happiness triggers for FREE at www.happywomantest.com and order your copy of Happy Women Live Better at: www.bn.com/happywomenlivebetter






Wednesday, September 24, 2014

Why Work At Friendship By Debra Courtney



Photo by Amelia Grace Photography

 “Be kind and merciful, and forgive others, just as God forgave you because of Christ.” Ephesians 4:32

Why do you suppose Jesus emphasized forgiveness? Because he wanted us to be nice? Because he didn’t care about justice because he was naive about human evil and what we do to one another? Because “gentle Jesus, meek and mild” simply didn’t grasp the horror of injustice?

Forgiveness was the focal point of Christ’s teaching because he knew that without genuine profound and “to the bone” forgiveness, there is no freedom, no real joy, no peace and no release from the pain and the “root of bitterness” that destroys nations, families and individuals. He understood that the key to everything important in life is forgiveness.

Have you known someone who builds fast friendships but then moves on to another friend at the first sign of conflict or disagreement? I really don’t want to be that type person. Do you? Friendships can deepen through adversity, grow through pain, and flourish with forgiveness. Rather than abandon someone who has hurt us, we should explore if we can work through the issue.

Lasting friendships only happens with hard work. Because we are human, we are not perfect people, and that affects every area of life – including our friendships. Over time, any friendship will fall victim to disagreement, jealousy, misunderstandings, and inconsideration. While we or our friends may give in to these shortcomings, that doesn’t mean that friendship is failed and worthy of being terminated.

Sometimes lifelong friendships are born through tears of forgiveness.

Would you throw away a diamond because it pricked you? One good friend is not to be weighed against all the jewels of all the earth. If there is coolness or unkindness between us, let us come face to face and explore what it is. Quickly, before the friendship grows cold. Life is too short to quarrel in, or carry dark thoughts of friends. It is easy to lose a friend, but a new one will not come for calling, nor make up for the old one when she comes.

Some friendships come’s with pressure. Some friendships come on purpose. Be on the lookout for what friendships God places in your life and why they are there.


Debra’s life goal is to inspire and motivate women globally to become all they have been created and designed to be by using the guiding principles of their Creator’s word in gaining wisdom, understanding their designed-given personality identities & create their purpose! 

Friday, March 21, 2014

"Why Work At Friendship" by Debra Courtney







“Be kind and merciful, and forgive others, just as God forgave you because of Christ” Ephesians 4:32



Why do you suppose Jesus emphasized forgiveness? Because he wanted us to be “nice”? Because he didn’t care about justice? Because he was naive about human evil and what we do to one another? Because “gentle Jesus, meek and mild” simply didn’t grasp the horror of injustice?

Forgiveness was the focal point of Christ’s teaching because he knew that without genuine profound and “to the bone” forgiveness, there is no freedom, no real joy, no peace and no release from the pain and the “root of bitterness” that destroys nations, families and individuals. He understood that the key to everything important in life is forgiveness.

Have you known someone who builds fast friendships but then moves on to another friend at the first sign of conflict or disagreement? We really don’t want to be that type person. Friendships can deepen through adversity, grow through pain, and flourish with forgiveness. Rather than abandon someone who has hurt us, we should explore if we can work through the issue.

Lasting friendships only happens with hard work. Because we are human, we are not perfect people, and that affects every area of life – including our friendships. Over time, any friendship will fall victim to disagreement, jealousy, misunderstandings, and inconsideration. While we or our friends may give in to these shortcomings, that doesn’t mean that friendship is failed and worthy of being terminated.

Sometimes lifelong friendships are born through tears of forgiveness.

Would you throw away a diamond because it pricked you? One good friend is not to be weighed against all the jewels of all the earth. If there is coolness or unkindness between us, let us come face to face and explore what it is. Quickly, before the friendship grows cold. Life is too short to quarrel in, or carry dark thoughts of friends. It is easy to lose a friend, but a new one will not come for calling, nor make up for the old one when she comes.

Some friendships come’s with pressure. Some friendships come’s on purpose. Be on the lookout for what friendships God places in your life and why they are there.



Debra’s life goal is to inspire and motivate women globally to become all they have been created and designed to be by using the guiding principles of their Creator’s word in gaining wisdom, understanding their designed-given personality identities & create their purpose!